i tried not to hear them when they said,
congratulations for you were engaged,
i tried not to feel the pangs in my heart
as i listened to their giggles and awe
as they watched your engagement photos.
i surmised those were the sweetest smiles
your lips could ever give.
...............what i'm feeling, i couldn't believe.
i need not to see those mementos frozen in time,
but i heard somebody said,
the bride-to-be has a smile like mine ,
her face resembles me perhaps when i was young,
this crazy thought came to my mind,
"........"
................too crazy a thought too difficult to understand.
i went away for a while,
carrying this sadness in my heart.
knowing that soon as i come back
both of you will be one.
it doesn't matter anyway,
you barely know i exist,
you don't even know my name
...................and it's not on your priority list.
the next time i saw you,
your finger seemed lonely without this ring,
the reminder that you belong to someone,
but now i think everything's changed.
i was saddened for you might be truly hurt,
but i could not deny the joy in my eyes,
.............and hope in my heart.
few months after,
out of nowhere,
you talked to me,
i was so happy you found me,
maybe this time you will know my name.
but as soon as the smile starts,
sharp arrows are coming straight to my heart,
happily you told me,
you will be, in week time,
be engaged again with someone new.
............i stared blanky,
how i wish you never talked to me.
the day came and you were very happy,
the big ring in your finger as if so alive and merry,
i cannot be true to what i feel towards you,
but i just gave you a smile,
look into your happy eyes and said:
"congratulations to you"
deep in my heart
i'm sad as ocean blue.
but sincerely,
be happy.
that's what i really want for you.